I think I must be dreaming, that you are here with me. Must have died and gone to heaven, and it's all that I hoped it would be. When the eagles forget how to fly, when it's twenty below in July. And when violets turn red, and roses turn blue. I'd be still in love with you.
I guess it's time to take a break from the exes. My ipod is about to die. I guess it was something I needed anyways. I was almost at the point where I wouldn't be able to smile again. What's the point of smiling when you're all alone in this world? Even the person with the biggest family feels alone. I gotta feeling that's gonna be a famous quote. It's true. Every day, I try to envision myself in the future with someone who is way beyond my expectations. Maybe the one I'm supposed to be with, has been in my face the whole time. When I was dwelling on the past, I was thinking about the things I told my exes, and the things they told me. I wonder if I really meant every word. Well it doesn't matter, because it can't be proven anymore.
Forever is a scary word, can I really see myself with her forever? I don't know. I do know that at the moment I am with her, forever seems perfect until she's no longer there. I don't think I can believe it when a girl tells me forever. I realized that forever now has an expiration date. I'm pretty sure a lot of people can relate to it. The way I feel right now.....I just wanna get through college and live life peacefully until that special person comes in my life. Because I don't wanna get hurt again. I've been hurt too many times. I am happy when I don't have fear in heart that the one I care about dearly is out somewhere cheating on me, losing her feelings for me, or likes someone else.
I'm at the age where I just wanna live life how I always envision before the lost of love came into my life. I know most people wanna be famous, rich, and all the good stuff. But me, I wanna change the world without all the world on my back. I want my 15 seconds of fame for my accomplishments then I just wanna live life like everyone else. Finally made it back to my place. Charging the ipod. Now I'm laying here, staring at the ceiling.
Can I Live? What all do I need to Live?
Money? Cars? Clothes? The finer things in life?
I just wanna live my life right. Whatever that may be.
I realize I see things, that most people can't see.
Like the red rose that grew from concrete.
Or like the feelings I feel that's within me.
I question so many things, that I never know the answer to.
How can a girl I barely know, say I love you.
Within weeks, I too was in love.
I'm too young for this, this pain is my addictive drug.
With the needle, I inject myself in the same spot.
I haven't overdosed yet, I wish I could stop.
You will never understand me. I can hardly understand myself.
Your tears that I've wiped away, was MY cry for help.
Yet again, I fall into the pains of your soul.
The pain that's within in you, now has me out of control.
So I give you my heart because your wasn't there.
All I wanna do, is prove to you I care.
I knew I was killing myself deep inside.
If loving and giving you my all was suicide. No doubt I was ready to die.
And did die, each and every time I gave you my heart.
Now I'm searching for life, in the midst of the dark.
Can I Live? Or is it time for me to rest in peace?
We'll find out if I don't wake up from this sleep.
Love,Live,Life
:::Byron Belle:::
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